At first glance – to an outsider – it looked like I was meant to be there. A part of the group, one of the crowd, in on the jokes. On closer inspection you would notice some small inconsistencies. Seven people – three couples and a spare. A laugh always a second behind – a questioning look that would bring an explanation of some long ago adventure being retold.
No matter how welcoming and hospitable your hosts – you are still the odd one out. It makes me wonder when I chose this path – where every day seems to involve more small talk, being on my best behavior and trying to find a place to fit in ever new social circles to which I have no history or ties. It is … tiring. I am not sure though – whether once you leave your known world – snip the ties that bind you to the everyday goings on in your friends and families lives, whether you can get that back. How long do you need to stay in a place – a job – a town – to begin to move to the same tune as those whose circles you have entered?